The question...

Words can't express the fear in my eyes.
My heart races as the question arises.
Is this something I want?
How do I feel?
His eyes pierce my soul as he ponders my thoughts.
The question holds firm in my mind.

How do I feel when he intertwines his fingers with mine?
Or when he presses his large soft lips against mine?
What about when his arms firmly and quite strongly squeeze me as he kisses my flushed cheek?
What do I feel?
What are my thoughts?

On and off online friends for months.
Phone calls shared once in a blue moon.
Giggles are given as laughter arises.
Finally we meet.
Stars in the sky couldn't sparkle more...
than the twinkle in his eyes when he looks in my direction.
But how do I feel?
What do I want?

First kiss happened in a blink of an eye.
Romance brews as a friendship grows.
Yet stirring in the back lies the unanswered question.

The smell, the touch, the mood he sets...
allures distress in his absence.
Patience, care and gentleness proceed from his actions...
while mine shake with unsteady and unaware surety.
Where does my heart lie?
Where do we stand?
What's sure in my mind?

I know I miss him when he's gone.
I know though time has been short...
I care for his well being.
When he grasps my hand I never want to let go.
When he softly looks in my direction...
I want to pull him close and kiss those tender lips.

Moments come where I question the destination.
Yet, it's turned around by a sweet simple gesture that melts the heart.
Where do I turn?
Where do I lie?
Should I make a decision or what it out?
Promised no pressure but fears to lead on...
as his heart deepens into the dream of two.

As my mind overheats, heat stroke beckons a cool shower.
Would I lose the greatest opportunity and gift if I let him go?
Our hearts long for the same.
Our goals match the same list.
A few ups and downs couldn't destroy the bond we share.

A few slips here and there...
of the word under my breath as he is preoccupied.
Could it just be the moment...or could it...
just possibly be truth?

Keep pushing it aside as a new moment arises.
A title is longing to be determined.
But what is it worth?
Must I rush the decision?
Or...am I only prolonging the truth?
WHAT DO I FEEL?!
How could this question be so confusing?

I'm treated like a queen upon her throne.
Respect, care and trust intertwine the relationship.
Anyone could point out the genuity of his heart.
I'm hot then I'm cold...
I'm yes then I'm no...
But is it black and white?

Where does my heart lie?
Could I hand over my heart once more?
Am I scared to let him in?
Maybe I know...but too scared to admit it?
Never have I never been given so much in more ways than one.

I never want his arms to let go.
I never want to stop hearing his dorky charming voice in my ear.
 Never would I ever dream of stopping the dance our hearts are beating.
But will I let it happen?
Will the key to my heart unlock the bruised treasure...
I'm deeply scared of giving?
He gives so willingly and trustfully as mine shrinks away in the corner...
when a personal moment arises.

Though time moves forward...
it's as if it stands still when our eyes meet.
Patience is difficult when you know there are feelings inside...
but unsure of how to use them.
Abused and weak, but still wanting to stand up and try again...
it prays for strength.
Will my heart be open to try again?

With an open mind and open heart I take his hand.
Lets see where this adventure could begin.
With an answer still undecided a breath of fresh air fills my lungs...
as I know I care for the man beside me.
A few weeks more with the Spirit guiding...
I turn the key to see if it's worth opening.